You need to get the F*%$ out of my system because you are the worst. I have been having a really hectic week, and the last thing I need is to feel like I am unworthy of having any of the things I have been working so hard for. Depression, you have been wreaking havoc in my mind for as long as I can remember, but your time is up. You are not welcome in my space any longer.
This week you told me that I was not going to make it. You told me I should quit trying to get more students because I was not good enough to market myself and get my own private clientele. Um, I’m sorry but I ALREADY have students. So, I have already proven you wrong. You told me that no one cares about me and I don’t have real friends. That was a low blow, Depression. You know I have struggled with trusting people enough to let them into my life.
It’s been many years since I have felt so low, but you helped me get to that very ugly and dark place yet again, Depression. This letter isn’t to let you know how much of a great job you’re doing. It’s not to let you know that you’ve won this war. You haven’t even won this battle. This letter is to let you know that I am done going back and forth with you. I cannot keep letting you talk to me. I don’t care how long it takes, but I will no longer listen to the sh*t you have to say to me.
When you told me I had nobody, I reached out to people. I told people what you said to me. I didn’t keep quiet as you always tell me to, and I snitched on you. I was afraid to do it, but I just got so tired of hearing your BS. I just wanted to know once and for all if what you’ve been saying is actually true. I guess the fault is mine for not being brave enough to tell on you sooner. As soon as I started speaking up, I realized that you’d been lying to me all along.
Nothing you said to me was true. I do have people that care about me, and I AM worthy. There ARE people who are concerned about my well-being and those people reached out to me. They reminded me of all the things I have accomplished, and how hard I work to get what I want. I am a walking survival story.
I came from a place where I did not have much support, and to see how far I’ve come without many resources is a clear sign of my strength and my abilities. You’ve visited me plenty of times throughout the years just to talk your sh*t to me but I’m still here. So, you can exit stage left, Depression. I have nothing left to say to you anymore, and you have nothing of value to say to me.
I hope you leave and never come back.